We wonder through this life hoping there’s enchanted immortality in an idealistic afterlife, constantly tucking away the things we don’t want to bring to bare as we push into the uncertainty of our conscious reality. Ultimately, we face the unpacking of life’s baggage to reveal with the clarity of hindsight, we fucked a lot of opportunities up along the way. All of man’s problems are a result of our collective consciousness, and the resulting behavior. The earth and universe have their moments of transformation and resulting tribulations, but our species is to blame for every single issue surrounding our modernity. Social, cultural, political, ideological conflict only exists within our perception of reality. For 300,000 years, our story has been evolving to what is now the present day. This portrayal of the accumulation of our understanding for how and why we exist remains anchored to the unproven mythical speculations of ancestors we deemed as prophetic, even though there’s not a shred of physical evidence to confirm this as reality. Nevertheless, I’m not here to write about the way ideological misgivings balloon into mythical misconceptions. I want to further my observations about the emotional entrapment gripping our species and more importantly, how do we break that grip. I only have to look at my personal perspective to get started. I was a very emotional child, full of love and elation over the things that made me feel good. Disappointments were a part of that, but they never felt like they were overwhelming. No one ever explained to me that this thing we call heartache was a normal part of the human experience. It was something much different than disappointment, and felt like it would never go away. I realized it’s stranglehold after my father came home drunk one night, and woke me up when I was fourteen. Him coming home drunk after spending his time drinking away from my mother and his children wasn’t something new. It was a generational type behavior for men of his era. They were children of a very authoritarian generation of fathers themselves. This lack of engagement for the emotional complexity of adolescence has helped to cast the die for all generations. Dad felt trapped by the expectations of a wife, who he felt detached from within his own complexity. He had met someone that listened to his plight, and come to the conclusion it was time to leave his family because of his detachment from mom. At fourteen and being his eldest child, he decided I was to be the new man of the house in his absence. My dad was leaving, and what little responsibility he supported around the family from a functional perspective was now on my shoulders. Oh, there’s a catch to this dysfunctional strategy of his. He hasn’t informed mom of his plans, so I couldn’t tell anyone of my situation. I was supposed to suppress any emotional entanglement with my reaction to cover his cowardice for unveiling his relief to his emotional turmoil. Selfish, absolutely, but this was how he was conditioned to cope with his own emotional entanglement from his life. What’s lost in this generational extrapolation of emotional suppression is the way we at crucial junctures of human development ignore the understanding of the adolescent individuals of how their own emotional entanglement works. Not a single concern for how I would deal with the abandonment from my father at a time my hormonal transition from childhood to early adulthood was overwhelming to say the least. My story is unique in its presence to me, but not isolated in the context for how we as a species fail at this critical development in the lives of our children. That failure to untangle our emotional complexity at the individual level until we are dysfunctional adults is the real problem. Adolescents don’t possess the capacity to effectively do it alone, and peer involvement mostly dilutes the situation. The dysfunctional parent only replicates the slightly enhanced experience of their own adolescence, and focused improvements are mostly a product of luck. People are groomed to figure out their own emotional entanglement and live within whatever results that process renders. This hasn’t changed much for most of modern times since our development of language and art. Remember, the period I’m referencing is the last 10,000 years, where written language can be used to gauge emotional expression. The process is evolving, but at Darwinian speed and is only recently within the last couple of centuries been adequately studied. Human beings possess so much more capacity than we currently exhibit, it’s going to take some time to learn how the best way to unlock it will be.