The loneliness of only being yourself…

…terrifies the fuck out of us


Nobody has this figured out, it’s anyone’s guess as to the why we’re here. Every generation churns out yet another layer of anxiety over the reason behind our why. The feeling of being alive is intoxicating, yet subversively paranoid simultaneously. Who else hears our thoughts, surely they echo across time.


Desire poised just beneath the surface of fear. Luring our spirit into its web of ecstasy and exotic fulfillment. Never relenting it’s constant reminder of the darkness within all of us. Only the strands of guilt hold us back from over indulgence. We can’t help ourselves for wanting, we can’t forgive ourselves for accepting.


As long as we don’t feel threatened, we feel we must know something special. Our vision of our existence is how everything fits together for us. Surely everyone else feels the same way about themselves. Suffering is a poor choice, cheer yourself up so no one feels badly about themselves. Anger will get you through the night.


Peace is the constant dream, if only we could locate its calm. Surely there are moments of this mythical clarity, but suffering to find them seems to be the barrier of resistance. Tolerance for the suffering is the weight of that feeling for existence. Life’s tide rolls across our memories, washing clean the residual effects. Leaving behind nothing but guilt for not trying harder.


Wasting away all those moments of being present in the suffering and not breathing in the essence of the space between the passing seconds. For its not fear of dying, it’s forgetting that our time falls within those gaps of anguish over the why. It’s love we seek, and how that feels. Reassuring our entanglement over how we arrived at another moment, and the weight lingers still.


You think because that’s all the mind knows to do. You feel because that’s how we deal with our thoughts. You live when you train the will to accept. Love is the harmony of realization of this transformation. Once you figure that part out, there’s no space for anything else. The fear, anxiety, and suffering subside for the tranquility of compassion. The weight of living has been lifted…


#love #life #peace #acceptance #compassioN


This topic rose to my attention this morning from my wife reading a news blurb on that book of faces about sex trafficking on the rise in our area. The article attributed this to the local branches of the gang culture. I’m not so naive to be surprised by this commentary, yet appalled nevertheless. The majority of all the negative aspects of a culture and society are inexplicably linked through their correlation to lack of education and the subsequent poverty surrounding that circumstance. That’s not the case in this scenario, the underlying precipice for this issue lies beneath the cultural disconnect of an over diversity within the region. Generally speaking, diversity improves any society, but at the margin it’s significantly more volatile. There hasn’t been sufficient curing time for the vast arrays of influences to fully meld into something more refined. Unfortunately, the disparities of those seeking to improve their lives has more of a social presence than their cultural benefits. 



Human trafficking has been an Achilles heel to mankind for as long as civilization has existed. Exploitation of another persons life against their choices is the most fundamental tragedy of our entire story. It boggles my mind to know this total disregard for the value of another humans consciousness has somehow slipped through the cracks of all the social advances we’ve experienced as a species. While officially outlawed in every country worldwide, the underlying issue remains present to this day


  “While slavery was institutionally recognized by most societies, it has now been outlawed in all recognized countries, the last being Mauritania in 2007. Nevertheless, there are an estimated 45.8 million people subject to some form of modern slavery worldwide. The most common form of the slave trade is now commonly referred to as human trafficking. Chattel slavery is also still practiced by the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant. In other areas, slavery (or unfree labour) continues through practices such as debt bondage, the most widespread form of slavery today,

(serfdom, domestic servants kept in captivity, certain adoptions in which children are forced to work as slaves, child soldiers, and forced marriage.)”



Knowing this still exists even in what’s considered one of the most advanced societies in the world suggests it may be more prevalent than the above number suggests. These are human lives we’re talking about here. It fully re-enforces that gratitude I realize for the life I have. It also drives within me the urge to try and make things better. I’m not exactly sure how that looks, but it has to start with telling a story of hope and getting more children better access to high quality early childhood development. There can be no better future without more children being developed into better adults.



The message is clear, yet not compelling enough to garner the right attention. There needs to be a delivery method that ties all the inequality to those children, and not the overbearing ideology clouding the vision for change. The children of our planet need a voice to be heard, not drowned out by the buerocracy of the elite ruling mechanisms of nation, state, and religion. A voice so loud and clear that every generation hears it resonate with their particular disposition. No matter what the culturally  biased obstacles may be. All humans want their children to have some sort of chance at life, they simply down understand what that modern opportunity looks like.